a walk in the park

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the things you dont tell your friends

 "She Shoulda Said No!" So in this film stuff happens, so much stuff, and it is insane, but none of that matters. The protag's brother at some point in the film hangs himself. There is a moment of perfect acting in this scene that took me away. The brother is hanging in the garage, long dead from the way the shot frames it,  he was hanging in the garage long dead from the frame of it She approaches the garage and there isn't an immediate reaction There is no immediate reaction. She just sees it. As if it were a meadow, or a curious bug flittering past. Her head leans almost imperceptibly, she is now looking at it quizzically, like there is some knowing to the seeing but there is a disconnect. Like watching a hard drive spin, this is the machine at work, trying to employ a solution to the wonder of what is seen, because the conclusion musn't be the conclusion. There is now a part of the brain that knows what it has seen, and has placed all senses and systems to the...
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Saturn

Parents - ungrateful? Am I ungrateful? Is this how my parents see me? Is wanting better ways of living and better communication a bad call? Why don't people like to change for the better? How can you talk to someone who tlwill always think they know better than anyone else? I don't think there is anything I hate more in this world than the sound of my own mother's voice. That's a sad thing to admit and I don't know if I could ever tell that to another person face to face. It makes me feel like a villain in the making. Like a person who's lost their soul. It feels so wrong, and yet all the more appropriate when I look at that reaction as being itself instilled by my mother brought me up, to believe that she could do no wrong and that I should always respect her and her opinion no matter what. To me that doesn't make any sense at all. I have my own son who is an adult now and I would never in a million years treat him the way I have been treated, I'd never...
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 When futurists of the past envisioned that in some far flung future we would transmit new information into our minds at lightening speeds the way its done on hardware. It was only obvious to the early elite of the psychedelic community in that day that what would come was not shrinking the amount of time that data is moved, rather expanding the perception of an amount of relative time within a frame of actual time and hyper focusing a doc set in sim, even works with docs on screen or archival prints. Using a mix of hallucinogenic compounds, usually DMT or LSD, with a nootropic or stimulant for hyperfocus. I saw a video once where a heroine learned how to fly a helicopter with a momentary seizure-like reaction. It's a little bit like that, but it takes like 6 hours and you usually end up ralphing once or twice. Not a bad trade off, though.  
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